Greetings. It's a new year and my only commitment thus far is to write more. I left my full-time employment so that I could write and proceeded to write less than ever. . . . best laid plans and all. Still, this is a year of the subtle body, of listening and obeying what you hear. This is a year of quiet resilience and steely steadiness. This is a year of infinite knowing and trusting, even in the face of ever-present doubt. This is the year of The Guru Within. And my inner voice has been whispering for more than two years now, write, write, write. So, here I am: writing.
There are many schools of writing. I suppose the two polarities I identify with most are these: One, If you can avoid writing, then please, by all means do. The world only needs those writers who MUST write. And Two, write for the exercise of writing. Practice your craft, tell your story so many times that it becomes its own story, listen to what is within and let it out. But the bottom line is this: I'm happier when I'm writing. Even when it takes me to dark places; even when I don't like the response I get; even when I'm scared by what I find on the page at the end of the day, I'm still happier when I'm writing. And that's what this being human is about yes? Being happy and whole and healthy--at least to the degree we can.
Last year was a challenge on a lot of levels: professionally, personally and spiritually. I'm not saying any of those challenges have resolved themselves completely, but I seem to have learned to put one foot in front of the other and continue forward. Even when it's like walking through mud. To put my reliance on momentum alone. Some kind of movement was better than none. And I learned that I could put out a beautiful, inspired album (The Pearl: Maiden, Mother, Crone) even when I didn't feel an ounce of inspiration myself. I learned that I could inspire others to teach and take on the identity of Teacher even when I was in complete duality and doubt about my own identity. I learned that I could be a person of faith without believing in anything outside of myself. And finally I learned just how fortunate I am that even in my most ungrateful selfish moments, I have had a home and food to offer to a stranger and I have had the Guru's Bani to bring me back to myself and my highest vibration.
So, I move from the year of challenge to the year of subtlety--and I look forward to reporting back to the things I will have learned by this time next year--God willing and the creek don't rise.
blessings and prosperity to you all in the coming year,
sat purkh, human being, woman, writer, singer, songwriter, teacher, trainer, wife, daughter, sister, auntie, gursikh, and more....
Greetings from the Land of Enchantment
That I may see . . . day four
That I may see . . . Day Two
So that I may see . . . Day One
A Very Subtle Year
Friday Night Rant
Becoming a Teacher
The Internalized Police State
He said . . . she heard
The Shakti Mantra
Down on Me with Iyaanrhee-ai Shabad
Story Time: The Guru Gayatri
The Mother's Shabads
The Pearl: Maiden, Mother, Crone
Track One--Durga Mantra--from The Pearl: Maiden, Mother, Crone